Kenny's Eyes or lack there of!
by InfamousleaderX
Summary: Tyson, Max, Ray and Kai decide they want to make fun of Kenny's eyes! Well Tyson mainly...Kai gets hit on by a scary 'hooker' girl, Ray hits on a 60yearold woman who he thinks is Mariah and Max gets put into mall jail...and Kenny still has no eyes!


Hello! I'm here for my fourth fic! Yay! I really need to update my other fics! I really do! I'm so slow AND it's summer holidays! Damnit! Anyway on with the fic…

**This is set in G Revolution by the way!**

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**Kenny's Eyes…or Lack There Of!**

On just another normal, boring, day with the Bladebreakers Tyson suddenly burst out with an unusual phrase.

"Hey Kenny…why don't you have any eyes?"

Max looked up from reading his letter he got from his mom in America. Kai opened his eyes from his usual position of leaning on the wall. Ray stopped sharpening his claws and Hilary…was on holiday! Daichi? He…went somewhere…ok! I don't know where he went!

"What the _hell_ kind of question is that?!?" Kenny answered back suddenly becoming very dark and weird.

"Woah! Kenny actually has some balls, finally…" Kai stated uncharacteristically.

Kai: Why the hell would I say that to some eyeless geek?

-Kaa-: Hey! I know you wouldn't say anything like that, hence, the word UNCHARACTERISTICALLY!

Kai: Well…I…shut up!

-Kaa-: Heh, heh, heh…1-nil…

Kai: What was that?

-Kaa-: (sing song) No-thing!

"Ok, ok! We'll change the subject! Sorry no eyes-" Tyson opened his eyes from his relaxed position with his hands behind his head. Kenny glared at him with as much force as could have mustered, you know, without the eyes and all. 

Kenny: WITHOUT WHAT?

-Kaa-: o. O…Erm…without…without…DIZZI! That's all…

Kenny: Tch…(walking away) I'll believe that when MONKEYS FLY OUT OF MY ASS!

-Kaa-: Such language from some guy with no ey-

Kenny: (Glare)

-Kaa-: o.O

"Hey guys let's go get something to eat, okay?" Ray tried to distract them and stop the tension from building any more. 

The guys agreed and so they went out to a nearby mall that had the best food court in the country or so Tyson said. They all just thought he wanted to get somewhere fast to get some food down his throat.

As they went through the mall Tyson walked, or more accurately ran, as fast as his could to the food court, Kai saw some beybladers their age that he could kick the crap out of…beyblading-wise, Max saw a candy store he was dying to go into, Ray passed a group of girls who were blushing and apparently fainted when he winked at them and as for Kenny he was minding his own business until…

"Hello sir!" A guy tapped him on the shoulder. "You seem like the type of person who would be interested in buying a new advanced software for the laptop. The only people chosen are special to be offered this great deal and-"

Kenny turned around fully to see this guy talking about a subject he was interested in.

"Ah!" The guy shouted in fright. He started to sweat buckets not knowing who or what he was talking to. "Er…this product is for special people and you are obviously _too_ special, bye!" The guy ran off leaving a trail of sweat along the mall floor.

Kenny hmphed and crossed his arms holding Dizzi.

"Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I have…haha…not seen _anything_…haha…as funny as that!" Tyson laughed and slapped Kenny on the back.

"Grr…" Kenny walked ahead of everyone towards the food court.

"Hey! I wanna get there first!" Tyson called and started running, pushing past kids and old people alike. Some even tried to trip him over with their canes for being so rude.

"Arrrgggggghhhhh!" Tyson screamed as he fell flat on his face.

Anyway…

"BEAT YA!" Tyson shouted triumphantly as he slammed the counter of the Big Momma's Pie Hut.

"It wasn't even a damn race!" Kenny bit back.

"Ok, ok! Just trying to lighten things up!" Tyson held his hands up in defence. "Talking about lightening things up. Remember that guy that was trying to sell you that software…he paled quicker than a…er…" Tyson tried teasing but couldn't think of a good anecdote that would match the situation.

"Quiker than you realising if there was no more food in the world?" Kenny piped in unenthusiastically.

"Yeah! Hey!"

"As much as I like to insult you right now I would like to order some food" Kenny half-heartedly replied.

"GUYS! HURRY UP! THE CHIEF'S HUNGRY!" Tyson waved to the guys who just came up the escalator that led to the food court on the second floor of the mall.

"THE CHIEF'S NAME ISN'T TYSON, YOU KNOW!" Max shouted back. Ray laughed and Kai chuckled deeply disguising it as abrupt coughing.

Tyson hmphed and looked at the menu above Big Momma's Pie Hut counter.

"Hm…what to get? Pie? Nah I don't feel like getting pie today…"

"THEN WHY ARE YOU STANDING AT BIG MOMMA'S PIE HUT? ALL IT SERVES IS PIE!" Kenny shouted, obviously still miffed about Tyson teasing him about the no eyes thing.

"Fine I'll have pie since I'm standing here! I'm not going to be picky! Unlike some people without eyes…sheesh!"

"I HAVE FRICKEN EYES!" Kenny screamed enough for the whole mall to hear. Saying this turned heads, which Kenny didn't want.

So from then on people kept staring at the place his eyes were supposed to be visible and mumbling as they passed "Hey where's that kid's eyes?" or "I might not have teeth but I still have my eyes!" Even on some extreme cases some kids started crying as soon as they had a glance at him.

Tyson laughed so hard then got over it remembering his growling stomach. He looked back to the menu and decided to have a chicken pie…and also a chicken and mushroom pie and then a steak and kidney pie and then probably all the pies that were available in Big Momma's Pie Hut!

The other guys finally got there since Max and Kai had to drag Ray from the girls that had seen him and fainted before. It seemed that they had dragged him to the girls' bathroom and did God knows what to him!

"Sorry we're late, Ray had some girl trouble back there!"

Tyson and Kenny looked back to Ray who was propped up against Kai. Ray seemed to have a tipsy look but that's not all that was on his face. Lipstick marks covered almost all of it even some covered his clothes?

Ray kept trying to kiss back to the girls but he hadn't realized that it was Kai and Kai seemed to be in and annoyed mood…as usual. So to stop Ray from getting any closer Kai…punched him in the face, which resulted in Max laughing and Kai the resulted in Max getting punched in the gut too.

"Can we order all ready? I'm hungry and I've got Kai's credit card. So guys order quickly before I make mine! You know how I like to get a little _extra_ when I get food!" Tyson shouted.

"What?!" Kai said, dangerously low. He dropped Ray on the floor with a hard thud.

"Are you all right Ray?" Kenny asked running up to him.

"Hey kid…you got no eyes! Hahahahahahahahahaha!" Ray slurred as if he was in a drunken state. The pleasure of the girls' kisses and the pain of Kai's punch kinda messed Ray's brain up a bit, you know, just a bit!

"I said 'can we order all ready? I'm hungry and I've got your credit card!" Tyson held said credit card up to Kai but kept his distance. Just looking at Ray and Max he didn't want to end up like that before lunch.

"If you think I'm paying for lunch you've got another thing coming!" Kai snatched away the credit card from Tyson's hand and walked away to another counter feeling that he didn't want to eat pie like Tyson.

"Aww Kai! Please? We have no money on us what so ever! You're our leader! LEAD US!" Tyson called after him. Upon hearing the word leader Kai decided he would 'help' his team after all. He smirked and turned around.

"You know Tyson…if I pay for this lunch, all of you have to do the training twice as long and twice as hard as usual…think carefully about this decision…concur with the rest of your team mates…is this lunch worth twice as much training?" Kai waved his credit card in front of Tyson's face, putting him in a trance.

"So what do you want to order guys?!!?!" Tyson shouted. Tyson hadn't realized that the others hadn't heard the terms of this deal so just started to order.

**15 minutes later**

"Hey guys! Why did that take so long? Usually we get our food in like 14 minutes!" Tyson pointed out. He was upset they hadn't got their food at the usual amount of time.

"Weeeelllll…" Max took a deep breath. "You were trying to order everything off the menu, even trying to order stuff that wasn't even available, Kai was being hit on by the girl at the counter even though he was insulting her left, right and centre!" Here's how it went when Max wasn't listening.

"So what's your name, cutie?" The creepy counter girl asked 'huskily'.

"The name's Ka…Tyson…" Kai laughed inwardly but flinched at the name cutie coming from her mouth.

"Love the name Tyson…so…er…I get off my shift in 10 minutes how about you and me go somewhere…private after?" She asked rather scarily. She decided that she would like to 'entice' her new interest by leaning over the counter suggestively.

Kai caught a glimpse and as soon as he saw he wanted to vomit. A sudden rhyme came to mind…

'God made sweets, God made cake, when God made you, sure was a mistake…' 

He turned around and gagged but wanted to get Tyson into some deep shit so…

"Sure…come round to mine and…" Kai tried to cringe inwardly but wasn't really working so then it turned out, as a weird looking expression but the girl didn't care. "…Wear something special…"

"What should I wear, Tyson?" She asked seductively.

Kai turned away and coughed. Her odour was not very bearable. Kai decided that it was a combination of working at a Pie Hut…and basically b-o!

Kai leant in closer to her ear, which seemed like it had not been cleaned for a long time.

"…Surprise me…" Kai whispered and he quickly withdrew to a standing position again.

"Ok…Tyson…" She winked at Kai and blew him a kiss then turned around to get back to work.

Kai wafted the air frantically to stop the invisible kiss ever reaching his personal space.

"Ugh! Get away, get away, get away…" Kai chanted as he continued to waft the air.

"So yeah that's what happened to Kai…er…Ray was trying to hit on an 60 year old woman who apparently looked like Mariah because Kai's punch did a number on his brain, I was trying to get the people to put sugar in all my food but they wouldn't so then I tried to climb over the counter to put the sugar on for them but then security came and I ran away and then Kai had to bail me out of mall jail then he ran after me to give me a special present the size of his fist and then I ran into a store to hide. When I saw he run passed I ran out and then I saw him waiting for me…" Max gasped for air.

He breathed in and out frantically, quickly replacing the loss of air. He glanced over at Kai who had a scary, maniacal smile on his face. Max shuddered. Kai's smile widened.

"Yeah…so what about Kenny? What did he do to stop me from receiving my food a minute early? Hey? Hey?!" Tyson shouted loudly demanding to know the reason.

"Kenny?" Max questioned as soon as he got his breath back.

"Oh Kenny!" Max began laughing. "Kenny…Kenny…haha…was having an argument with…with…haha…the other girl at the counter who…haha…who wouldn't serve him because she said…hahahahahahahahahahahaha…she said he had no eyes!!!!!!! Then she began this whole rant thing saying…if you don't have eyes how are you able to see what the food looks like or where you gonna sit after ordering…ahahahahahaha…then she ordered security to take him away and he didn't even do anything…ahahahahahaha…"

The whole of the bladebreakers were laughing. They had tears in their eyes and tried hard not to fall off their chairs. Max and Ray was trying to not choke on their food and Kai was coughing extra hard but you could tell he was laughing. Tyson…he actually fell off his chair and rolled around clutching his sides. He got up and sat back in his chair but then put his head to the table and banged it with his fist.

Looking to Kenny, he was chanting the phrase quietly to himself 'I have eyes. I have eyes. I have eyes.' Suddenly he couldn't take it anymore and screamed out to the rest of the people in the mall and probably the whole world.

"I…HAVE…FREAKIN…EYES YOU UNEDUCATED FAT ASSHOLES!!!" He exploded loudly and slowly? (Shrugs)

Everyone: O.O

"Ok, ok! You have eyes! Geez! You gotta learn to take a joke, really Kenny!" Tyson patted him on the shoulder sympathetically as his shoulders heaved up and down, calming himself down.

"Yo, sad-sack! You may have balls but keep them under control! You're corrupting the minds of the younger generation!" Kai said angrily pointing at Max who was close to tears as he kept his hands over his ears.

"It's ok now Max…you can take you hands off your ears" Kai patted Max on the shoulder acting big brotherly all of a sudden. Max sniffed and did what Kai said.

"Thank you Kai! You're my best friend!" Max tried to hug Kai but Kai punched him. "Oww!"

"Men don't hug…" And Kai went back to his pie.

"What the hell?!" Kenny shouted. "I get picked on because I apparently haven't got any eyes and yet I come out as the bad guy!?!?!"

More laughter erupted from Tyson and he fell out of his chair…again.

Upon seeing Kenny about to burst out with another round of profanities, Rei slapped his hand over his mouth and yelled…

"Tyson! Stop fricken laughing or…or…or we'll take away your food and we mean all of it!" Ray threatened.

"No, no, no! I'll be good! I'll be good!" Tyson sat back in his chair and an invisible halo appeared above his head.

**5 seconds later**

"Kenny has no eyes! I really want more pies! Who is grumpy? It is Kai! Max is on a high! Ray is…not a rhyming word...apparently" Tyson happily sang whilst moving his arms in a circular motion.

"Aaarrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!" Kenny ran out of the mall and back to Tyson's house to hide out the weird looks and stares and Tyson's incessant singing.

All Bladebreakers ran after him with a comments from Tyson like 'Wow! He runs fast for someone that has no eyes!' or "How can he run so fast? We're the ones with eyes!' or even 'Man I'm hungry! I wish I had something to eat!' earning a reply from Kai like 'we just ate 7 seconds ago! Chew your tongue or something or I'll punch you so hard you won't have to eat for the next couple of years!'

Which finally shut Tyson up!

**Tyson's house**

When they got to Tyson's house they found Kenny 'sleeping' on the veranda.

"Woah! Looks like old no eyes knocked himself out!" Tyson laughed. Ray glared at him.

"Haven't you tortured him long enough today Tyson?" Ray asked angrily, moving Kenny properly onto the veranda. He was laid half on and half off.

"No not really Ray!" Tyson shrugged and moved closer to Kenny to get a better inspection of the eye area.

Kai moved aside to the wall and closed his eyes and crossed his arms. Max being curious also decided he would look with Tyson. Max took the first step into discovering the creepy truth. Max poked the spot where his right eye was supposed to be and drew his hand back in one swift motion. Tyson suddenly had a great idea.

Kai: That's a first! 

-Kaa-: I concur!

"Hey guys let's poke Kenny to see where his eyes are!" So then Tyson poked him all over his face. Not a very nice gesture for when you're knocked out. Soon Ray let curiosity take over him and joined Max and Tyson who enjoyed poking Kenny a little _too _much! 

"Poking, poking, poking fairy princess!" Tyson sang with a very happy expression and randomly poking Kenny.

Next Tyson decided to lift up Kenny's fringe to see if there was actually anything there.

"Aaarrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!" Tyson, Max and Ray jumped out of their skins when they saw…dun, dun, dun…NOTHING! They all piled into the house and slammed the door shut leaving Kai with the unconscious boy that had no eyes where normal peoples eyes were supposed to be. During the guys' running into the house they had knocked Kenny's glasses off his head and onto the floor.

Now Kai being the hot, cute and caring guy he is, picked up the glasses and noticed something. There was a speck of dirt on the glasses and scratched it off.

"Oww! Whoever did that has got sharp nails…" Kai jumped when he heard the weak voice next to him. Kai poked the glasses and an 'ow!' emitted from the boy that was now coming to.

"Guys! Kenny's waking up!" Kai called and continued to hold the glasses.

Tyson, Max and Ray came out of the house slowly, fighting to be last and not be the first to see. Kenny sat up and opened his eyes. They all watched him even Kai leaving his attention from the glasses.

"Hey Kai!" Were his first words.

"WHAT?!?!" They all exclaimed.

They all could clearly see that Kai was stood behind and a little to the left. Kai wasn't even stood on the veranda. Kenny was sat up and looking forward.

The guys, now totally freaked out, went over to Kai slowly avoiding Kenny's body. As the guys came, Kai noticed something moving in the corner of his eye and looked down at his hands where Kenny's glasses were. It was in fact the glasses blinking.

"Argh! Holy crap!" Kai threw the glasses and Max, which he caught haphazardly.

"Ow!" Kenny moaned.

Max looked down and threw the glasses at Ray who then started the chain of 'ow's' that came from Kenny. The glasses finally landed to Tyson who caught them just as they were going to land in Kai's hands.

"Woo hoo! I caught them! What do I win? Food? Food? Tell me its food!" Tyson looked down and saw the 'eyes' blinking.

"Aaarrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! KENNY'S EYES ARE IN HIS GLASSES!" Tyson being so freaked out decided to kick the glass-eye things over the wall onto the road.

"NO! MY EYES!" Kenny shouted as they all heard a loud crunching of glass.

Ray was the first one to move from the shock of finding out that Kenny's eyes were actually in his glasses. He ran out of the garden and behind the wall of the house towards the road. When he came back everyone had backed away from Ray as far as they possibly could.

"Ray! Don't come anywhere near us with…with…those!" Tyson called as he was squeezing the air out of Max.

"Tyson…fat…give…me…air…" Max breathed.

"Don't worry guys I'm gonna give them back to the chief" He called and walked towards the possibly blind boy.

"Er…here…chief" Ray, with his arms stretched as far as they went, placed the glass eye things where they were supposed to be on Kenny's head and ran to the other guys in the farthest corner of the garden awaiting the results.

"Phew I'm not blind! Hey guys I'm not blind!" Kenny shouted as he ran to the guys in the corner with his arms outstretched expecting a hug from his fellow teammates.

"Argh! He's coming! Run away!" Tyson screamed and they all scattered. Kai on the other hand didn't hear Tyson since he wasn't paying attention and it was that loud. So when Kai opened his eyes from his usual position he saw the weird kid running towards him.

"Argh!" Kai yelled as Kenny hugged his team leader with all his might.

"Get this freak off me"! Kai shouted to his wimpy teammates who had ran to the other farthest corner of the garden!

"Kai! I'm not blind! You're my best friend! You were there to help me find my eyes and you're here for me now to celebrate in this joyous occasion! Yay! Friends forever! FRIENDS FOREVER!" Kenny proclaimed as he squashed Kai even more.

"Get the hell off me ya freak!" Kai cried as he tried to wrench free from Kenny's grip.

"Guys, if you don't help me now double training won't be all that's gonna worry you…" Kai threatened, glaring at each teammate as they looked at each other.

Tyson, Ray and Max advanced from their positions slowly and every time Kenny moved even the slightest they would run back to where they started.

"Wusses…" Kai sighed and finally got fed up of all of them.

"Yes! Yes they are! Except for you and me Kai! We're the best in this team! Yep! No one can top the dynamic duo!" Kenny exclaimed some more as he snuggled into Kai's arm more.

"Argh! That's it!" Kai yelled as he cracked. He punched Kenny in the stomach and walked towards the others to give them the beating of a lifetime!

"Run! He's gonna give us Kenny germs and then our eyes will go into our glasses!" Tyson cried as he ran away some more. Ray and Max on the other hand stood where they were and gave him a weird look.

As Kai continued to chase the others to give them their beatings Kenny was still on the ground trying to take the impact of Kai's punch…still.

"I'm…ok guys…" Kenny strained as he held up 1 finger from his doubled over position on the grass signalling for the guys to give him 1 minute to recover. Of course the others didn't pay attention and just concentrated on not getting beat down!

After Kai had finished with the beatings they all sat down under the sun and tried to figure out how Kenny's eyes had gotten into his glasses.

"Maybe Kenny paid for an operation to have his eyes put in his glasses" Tyson finally spoke out.

"Why would he _want_ to have his eyes in his glasses? Idiot…" Kai concluded.

"Well…maybe he wanted to see his laptop better…" Tyson nodded slowly.

"And just where would he have gotten the money from to pay for that operation? Dumbass…"

"Maybe someone found out about his glass eye things and decided they would exploit the freak for a lot of money and then give him a 10% cut…" Tyson thought.

"Hey!" Kenny defended. He wasn't up to being called a freak! No, no it's obviously good for him to be hypothetically exploited!

"How would he have gotten exploited for his 10% cut when he hadn't gotten the operation for his eyes to be put into his glasses? Ass wipe…" Kai asked back, closing his eyes, embarrassed at Tyson's stupidity.

"Hell-o! He would have paid for the operation so then he would have gotten exploited! Geez Kai here I thought our almighty leader knew everything! Guess he didn't know how to listen!" Tyson laughed and elbowed Max seeing if Max was on the same wavelength as he. Judging by the look on Max and Ray's face they weren't! (¬. ¬)

"So Tyson, how would he have gotten the money in order to have the operation?"

"He would have been exploited! Duh!" Tyson answered back smugly.

"How would he have been exploited?" Kai asked back, rolling his eyes at the fact that Tyson hadn't caught on yet.

"He would have had the operation! Where's this going Kai? If you don't understand you just have to say I'd gladly repeat this information in lamens terms for you!" Tyson offered smiling widely thinking Kai was stupid. (Sorry for my spelling!)

"Oh f…How would he have gotten the operation?" Kai said slowly through gritted teeth.

"Paid for the operation…then…exploited for money…then…" Tyson was concentrating very hard as you could tell by the sweat drops appearing on his head.

"Get there freakin faster! Geez!" Max shouted.

"Woah! Vicious cycle!" Tyson grinned, nodding his head, finally realising.

"Vicious cycle my ass…it wasn't even real!" Ray said under his breath.

"Grr…That's it! My parents put my eyes in my glasses, made loads of money and ran off to live in Hollywood!" Kenny stood up suddenly and confessed.

"Ahahahahahahahaha…" and so Tyson started his just plain old mean laughing again.

"Where have I heard that story before?" Ray pondered scratching his invisible beard.

"Hahahahahahahahahahahaha…" Tyson continued rolling on the ground holding his sides.

Kai, Max and Ray gasped.

"YOU'RE THE BLINKY BABY!" They shouted.

"You're…Ahahahahahahahaha!" If possible at all Tyson laughed even harder.

"NOOOOOOOOO! YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO FIND OUT! NO ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO FIND OUT!" Kenny shouted out in terror.

"Ahahahahahahahaha!" Tyson continued his laughter. It was loud enough for the next continent to hear! Of course all the guys were getting bored judging by the frustrated sighs and the rolling of the eyes until…

"Now that you guys know my secret I'm afraid that you mustn't be allowed to live any more…yes that's right...no live no more…haha…this will be fun to kill…fun to kill…heh…kill to fun…to kill fun…Muhahahahahahahaha!" Kenny suddenly had a crazy expression on his face…I can't really say he has a crazy look in his eyes can I?

"Now I must kill with…PIE! Muhahahahahaha!" He shouted as he suddenly had a handful of pies in both hands.

And so Kenny threw pie at the guys, which seemed limitless by the way, Max ran away…probably back to America to his mommy, Ray tried to claw at Kenny being the neko-jin he was but the pies were too much for him and also the fear of the 'blinky baby' was holding him back so he jumped over the wall like a cat just got sprayed with the hose. Kai walked past him and just punched him in the stomach, which seemed that it did nothing to stop the eyeless kid so Kai just walked away anyway feeling that the matter at hand was getting tedious by the second.

But Tyson on the other hand had to be difficult and started eating all the pies being thrown at him. It was becoming a freakin air-born buffet by the second!

"Why can't you just die you...fricken…albatross!?!?!?" Kenny struggled.

"Hey what happened to all the pies?!?!" Tyson shouted.

"I'll give you fricken pies you freakin garbage can…"

And so now Kenny started to throw lamps instead of pies.

¬¬¬¬¬

Well that's the end of this one-shot. I don't actually think this was funny! It's just a story to take piss out of someone so I thought you know let's pick on the most unattractive of the bladebreakers and also the most useless! Kenny!

Sorry about all the Tyson bashing and the others too. I just thought it was funny…hm…guess not! Don't get me wrong! I like all of them well exceptfor Kenny...

Anyway my new fic should be up soon!

**New fic: My Date with Kai!**

**Summery: Where YOU get to date Kai without the use of describing OC's and yourselves! Now doesn't that just save a lot of time…ok the thing is that it's just set in first person from your point of view!**

Anyway please R R! NO FLAMES PLEASE!


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